Another Break

Hey folks,

So sorry to say this, especially since I've been dreadfully unfaithful in posting daily this past few weeks, but I am taking a small break from this blog.  The trouble I have been having sleeping lately, a week long trip I am leaving for in the morning, and a few other things in life have caused me to realize that this a very good time to step back.

Many times in the past I will faithfully press on, trying to finish a project, and halfway through I realize that I've been doing it for the sake of doing it, not for the sake of any benefit it might have for myself or anyone else.  In those times I have taken a break, and started up again, fresh and full of new enthusiasm for the true purpose of those projects, and any others; to glorify God.

I feel that a break is due, even though I feel partly guilty in taking it, and I will be back in a week or two, hopefully with less mournful posts than have been posted recently.

I love you all dearly and continue to keep you in my prayers.

Blessings!

~Emily

~Object 77~ A House

She built a house, unsure if it was on sand or rock; insecurity and doubt hindering each stone she stacked.  Should she place this one there, or hold it back?  Should she check harder, for sound footing?  Should she give up and tear the whole thing down, or just continue stacking?

It was all new territory for her, and it was wonderful most of the time, but worries and concerns still pushed their way between she and the stones she was stacking.  She had held off building her whole life, knowing it wasn't the right time, and now she wasn't sure if it was or not.  It felt too beautiful, the stones too grand... was it right?


She would stop worrying at all, and stack a row or two of beautiful, smooth stones, and then she would stop, in shock, wondering if she ought to have done that.  She was having to analyze everything she did, trying to be wise, but not fearful; trying to feel if the ground was sturdy or not, but not trusting her senses.


Apparently building a house is harder than it sounds.

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Over and out,

~Emily

P.S.  Okay, I know it sounds rather petty and unimportant, but I would love it if you guys would continue to pray for me sleep.  I have continued to sleep poorly, and it is really starting to take its toll on me.  

I would love to be in prayer for you all, as well!  Please feel free to contact me any time, I love hearing from you.  

Blessings!

~Object 76~ A Dress

"Therefore do not be anxious, saying, 

‘What shall we eat?’ or 

‘What shall we drink?’ or 

‘What shall we wear?’ 

For the Gentiles seek after all these things, 

and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all.  

But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, 

and all these things will be added to you."

(Matthew 6:31-33)

She had always interpreted this passage as, "don't worry about what you eat or wear because it doesn't matter at all anyway, and it'll get taken care of."

How dreadfully wrong she was about it.  Slowly she has started to understand that this passage isn't saying these things don't matter, but rather that they do.

The Old Testament is full of laws about the smallest, minute details of people's lives; the tassels on the priest's  robes, the measurements of the tabernacle tent, which parts of sacrificed animals go where.  God cares about things in our lives that seem dreadfully small and insignificant.

She had selfishly been hoping for another summer dress or two.  Silly, yes, but she really wanted some.  She had felt, though, that it was too frivolous an issue to actually pray about it, so she didn't.

Well, for some reason God cared about her silly summer dresses.  She had finished a day of work and was picked up by her mom and whisked off, rather begrudgingly, to her sister's eye doctor appointment.  On the way to the next stop she asked if she could be dropped off at the GoodWill, rather than sitting through a hair appointment.  She didn't actually expect to find anything, but piled clothes into her arms just for the fun of it.  After trying on about a dozen articles of clothing, she left the store with two pretty, comfortable summer dresses that fit her perfectly.

She would never have gone to the GoodWill were it not for the annoying errands that she was forced to tag along during.  She would never have had to tag along during the errands if she hadn't been running a few minutes late at work.  She would never have been running a few minutes late at work if the last few customers hadn't interrupted her jam pouring.

God had the entire thing planned out.  It seems insane, but He cares about those dresses.  Similarly, He cares about everything in our lives, no matter how small or insignificant it may seem.

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Over and out,

~Emily

P.S.  Thank you so much for your prayers, I slept wonderfully last night.  Here's hoping that won't be a one-time thing!  Blessings!

~Object 75~ An Alarm Clock

She hadn't slept well in at least a week.  Her mind was too busy at night, and it took her a couple of hours just to fall asleep.  Dreams then plagued her all night long, and she tossed and turned the entire time.  In the early morning she woke up every ten minutes from about five o'clock on.

Finally each morning she rolled out of bed and turned her alarm off, because she didn't need it.  There were times during the day that she felt drowsy, and even dizzy, but somehow she pushed through work days and still had a little bit of energy left for the afternoon.

Each night the process was repeated: get ready for bed, set alarm, lay in bed for a couple of hours, fall asleep, dream, toss and turn, wake up, fall asleep, wake up, fall asleep, wake up, fall asleep, wake up, turn alarm off, get up.

Why she even set the alarm, she wasn't quite sure; she didn't need it.  She did realize, though, that she couldn't make it without God.  Again and again she has had to learn this lesson, and again and again she forgets it.  This time around it wasn't quite as obvious, but thinking back, she realized that she could not have made it through the week without her Savior sustaining her.  Multiple times she felt dizzy enough that she was a bit frightened.  Multiple times she couldn't think straight.  Multiple times, while trying desperately to fall asleep, she wanted to cry.

And He sustained her.

On top of that, He continued to wake her before her alarm.  It's silly, but she hates waking to an alarm, and He knows this.  He is allowing her to wake naturally, without the near heart attack that an alarm causes, and is giving her extra time to spend with Him each morning.

No, it's not ideal, but it's a lesson.

And so the alarm continues to be set, and turned off before making a sound.

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Over and out,

~Emily

P.S.  While this is a great lesson, I would still definitely appreciate your prayers... I could really use a good night's sleep.  Blessings!

~Object 74~ A Silver Lining

They say every cloud has a silver lining.  The problem she often encounters is actually seeing this mysterious silver lining.  She has been in the midst of a dark, all consuming storm.  The clouds surrounded her and she could see nothing of the sun.  Light was blocked out and rather than chasing the storm away and searching for the bright side, she wallowed in it.

The sun is out again, and she sees each cloud from a changed perspective.  She sees now that the clouds she just trekked through have glorious silver/gold edges... shining a hopeful light on her life.

Yes, the storm was hard, the clouds were thick, the idea of a silver lining seemed almost laughable at the time, but hind-site is 20/20.  How almost beautiful that storm seems now.  She has been drastically changed by it, and is closer to her King for it.  While she was in it, all she could see was the darkness, but now she is nearly blinded by the glorious silver lining.

How dreadfully lacking in perspective she is so very often.

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Over and out,

~Emily

~Object 73~ A Lighthouse

She wished she were in the lighthouse.  To be able to see all around, even in the storms, and to spread light in such a noticeable way; how glorious that would be!  She was sitting in a small boat, being tossed around on waves that she never could have expected, and she saw a streak of light across the sky, on and off, on and off.

She saw the lighthouse, but wished that she were there already.  She wanted to get out of the boat and climb the stairs of the beacon tower.  She longed to leave her storm and better help other people through theirs.

What she had failed to acknowledge, though, is that there is a lighthouse.  She had been so focused on wishing she were in its safety, out of and away from the tossing of this storm that she had almost forgotten that there is someone not only in the lighthouse, but there is someone who is the lighthouse.  And He knows what is best, even when she lacks the perspective to see it.  He stands firm in the calm and in the storm, and He is never shaken by the storms that shake her.

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Over and out,

~Emily

~Object 72~ The Sun

They set out walking along the road, talking, laughing, hoping to reach the top of the hill before the sun was lost behind the mountains, but not trying too hard.  Having accomplished their goal, they stood at the top, looking at, but trying not to look at, the sun.

The trees took on a sheen; an ethereal, resplendent, almost unearthly light.  Feeling the golden beacon penetrating her soul, she was warmed from the inside out.  Standing in the presence of such glory was breathtaking.

She felt a gripping, almost smothering sense of the presence of God.  Surrounded by the inconceivable beauty that is the sun, she could not help but think that even this splendor was nothing in comparison to the beauty and majesty of the Son of God.

In just a moment, the sun was gone.  That quickly the spell was broken, and she understood.  She understood that we have these moments of splendor only for a moment because life itself only lasts for a moment.  The beauty of the hills illuminated by the setting sun will someday be gone forever.

And we won't miss it.

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Over and out,

~Emily

P.S.  So sorry about missing a couple of days there.  I've been busy, but this is supposed to be an object every day... not just when I feel like it.  Love you all!  

~Object 71~ A Wedding Ring

The circle has no beginning and no end, so why is it that a wedding ring is a circle?  Naturally it stays on the finger best that way, and of course there will not be (or ought not be aside from death) an end, but every marriage has a beginning.  As someone who sees an analogy hiding in every object, she had to dig deeper; she had to think it through.

Maybe marriage doesn't have a beginning.  Maybe, since before time existed, God had he and she in mind for each other.  Yes, the marriage itself has a beginning, but the idea never did.  The idea was there before the people ever took their first breaths... a beautiful, masterfully written love story.

How stunning.  How breathtaking an idea.  We cannot even wrap our minds around it...and yet we try to because it is so glorious.

And so, too, is our love story with God through Christ.  Yes, the fall did happen, there was a beginning to separation with God.  Yes, Jesus paid the price, there was a beginning to reunion with God... but the ideas were always there.  There has never been an instant when God was not thinking about the marriage that will be ours.  The story is not even complete yet; the marriage has not yet begun, but the idea was there before the line of time was ever penned.  

It is eternal, with no beginning or end.  The ring is symbolic, the analogy does hold up, the picture is beautiful.

P.S. I finally did it, Tianna!  I hope this was satisfactory. Thank you for letting me use photos of your beautiful ring! <3

~Object 70~ A Flower

She realized today that she is a petal; we all are.  We each need one another to be as beautiful as we are meant to be.  A petal by itself is lovely, velvety and colorful, totally unique, but petals cannot live by themselves.  Petals need to be attached to each other, along with leaves and a stem in order to survive.

She was trying to figure out what the different pieces of the flower are, and a friend helped her figure that out.  The petals are people.  We need each other in order to thrive.  She has been relying on people lately like she never has before; she just needs them.  The stem is prayer, and that connects us to the water, which is God.  The stem is far more important than the other petals.  We've all seen flowers that only have two or three petals, but they are still able to do fine.  She's never seen a flower doing just fine that has no stem.  We need our stem in order to survive at all, and it causes us to blossom and bloom and flourish.

She often neglects one or both of those parts.  She will feel guilty for relying on people, or, "too busy," to pray as she ought.  Both parts are so very important, though.

How beautiful flowers are when properly taken care of!  How silly it would be to go along cutting the stems off, because they are not the prettiest part.  It would be ridiculous; yet we do it all the time.  She is constantly neglecting prayer as though she believes it doesn't matter.  Without the stem, though, the flower never blooms at all.

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Over and out,

~Emily

~Object 69~ A Piece of Candy

She has always had a sweet tooth.  She thoroughly enjoys gorging herself on chocolate, ice cream, candy.  The problem is, though, that she always wants more; she's never satisfied.  She has one piece of candy, and she wants another and another, but is never filled.

This world is so like candy.  We like it, we enjoy its taste and we want more and more and more.  But we have a void in our life that the entire world is incapable of filling.  We can eat as much as we can possibly stuff into our systems, and we will never be satisfied.

Funny that it usually takes her getting nearly sick on candy before she realizes that it's never going to satisfy.  She has called herself a fast learner most of her life, but sometimes she wonders...

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Over and out,

~Emily

~Object 68~ A Tapestry

She has been dreadfully nearsighted lately.  She looks and all she sees are a few ugly strands of thread.  They seem pointless and silly.  She looks and sees the small corner of something filled with strange colors that are not to her liking.  She sees something blurry and unknown.  She doesn't like the picture at all.

What she is failing to see is the tapestry that these pieces make up.  She sees only a square inch of the glorious masterpiece that is in the making.  She sees what is happening right now, and fails to remember that there is more to come.

God weaves our lives together, our actions together, our choices together, our mistakes together, our could-have-beens and what-ifs together.  He weaves all of this into a tapestry that is His grand story.

The pieces don't seem too beautiful by themselves.  We see a thread here, a bead there, a tassel or a button, a half-finished flower or tree.  None of this is spectacular, some of it is ugly.

Beginning to end, though, it is beautiful.

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Over and out,

~Emily

~Object 67~ Gold

She felt filthy, dirty, ugly and grimy.  She saw nothing in herself that was pure or holy, set apart or righteous.  She had had multiple people tell her recently that she was a great light, but she didn't see it at all, and the idea only confused her further.  Everything she did felt wrong.  She felt so very messed up and human.

She thought further, though, and realized that she saw the things that floated to the surface.  She saw the obvious; the mistakes, the character flaws, the break-downs and the sin.  She saw the dross.

Like gold in the midst of the heating process, she needed some refining, and God was hard at work.  He was heating and heating and heating, and the ugly things were floating to the top.

The thing about dross, though, is that it's not just meant to sit on the top of the gold, it is meant to be taken off.  This was where things got a bit more difficult.  It's one thing to recognize character flaws and ugliness, but it's an entirely different thing to do something about it.

She knows that one day God will be done refining her, and He'll take her home, but for now she is in the fire, she is being perfected, and it is hard.

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Over and out,

~Emily

~Object 66~ A Firework

They sat around a table playing cards, and listening to fireworks go off in the distance.  She had always loved them, but hadn't gone to watch them for a few years.  There was always something better to do, or they were too far.

She had seen, and been a part of, a different kind of firework recently.

She bottles things up.  Like stuffing firecrackers with gunpowder, she stores worries, anxieties, frustrations and sadness away, shoving it all deeper and deeper, fitting more and more.

Something small usually lights the fuse.  Someone does something, "wrong," or says a small, biting word, and it isn't long until she blows.

For some reason, though, joy doesn't work that way at all.  She doesn't bottle that up; there is rarely a need to.  She shares her joys, her triumphs, her fun times with the world, and there is no explosion later on.

It's so strange that the physical firework and the emotional one are so very different.  How beautiful an explosion can be in the right place...and how ugly in the wrong.

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Over and out,

~Emily

P.S. Happy Independence Day, folks!  I hope you all had a lovely day celebrating the beautiful gift of freedom.  God bless you all!

~Object 65~ Jam

The heat was turned on under the pot of frozen berries.  Slowly the ice melted, and the fruit began to soften and release juice.  She started mashing the berries, and they turned into a rich, deep sauce, which was left to itself, getting hotter.

Eventually, and after adding a few essential ingredients, the mixture was ready for the now heated jars.  She later stood back and admired the gem-like jars full of jam.

She realized then that she was just like that fruit.  She needed to be melted, heated, smashed, added to, stirred and poured in order to be what God needed her to be.

One day maybe she will look back and marvel at the smashing, melting, heating process, but she is still in the midst of it, and it's hard.

But she knows that the master, "Jammer," has the end product in mind.  He knows the beauty that will come of this.

And that alone is enough to give her some peace.

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Over and out,

~Emily

~Object 64~ A Steppingstone

The steppingstones she had been walking on were very easy.  She could see each step and knew that it was secure.  Walking on the easy path in a beautiful meadow, she was content.  Glancing at wildflowers and clouds as she walked, the even, easy path did not necessitate looking where she was going.  All was effortless.

A fog settled over her path, and she soon heard water rushing past her.  She questioned each footstep, tested each stone, looked for easier routes.  The sun hid behind thick clouds.  She couldn't see, and she was paralyzed with fear.  What if she stepped wrong?  What if the fog made the stones slick, and she fell?  She imagined the stones crossing a mighty river, and she began to tremble.

Cautiously she reached one foot out, groping for a stone.  Scared of falling, she stood still, shivering and scared.  Staying there far too long, she finally decided that she needed to do something, so she reached her foot out and placed it down again.  A stone!  She did this again and again, finally almost running across the steps.  Exhilarated, she gave up on worry and trusted that the path before her would be secure; trusted that God would place stones before her.

The fog lifted and she looked around in wonder.  The sound of water that she had heard proved to be a calm, trickling stream.  She looked down and the steps were large and sure, and she knew that her King, the master path-layer, had been in perfect control the whole time.  If only it was easier to remember this while in the fog.

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Over and out,

~Emily

~Object 63~ A Castle

She had built a castle in her head.  The structure was solid, the idea was complete, there were no problems, it was calm, and something that she thought she had control over.

She imagined the medieval castles being built a thousand years ago.  Each brick, each stone was placed just so.  The people trusted in that structure.  It was secure, it was solid, it was their protection from the unknown.  The castles crumbled, though.  Wars came, battles were fought, and many of those castles are no longer here, or are no longer solid structures.

Her castle was crumbling.  She watched as each brick fell, one by one.  Uncertain of whether she ought to feel joyful or fearful, anxiety filled her.  What was she supposed to build now?  She had begun building this structure years ago; she had relied on it, dreamed about it, clung to it like a blanket.

And it was collapsing before her eyes.

She realized that she was trying to pick the pieces up again; trying to rebuild what had been lost, but it didn't feel right.  Her structure then started to look wrong, and she almost wanted to pull more bricks down.  She was now uncertain as to which bricks ought to stay, and which really should come down.  She started doubting and second guessing herself.

"The Lord will fight for you, and you have only to be silent."

(Exodus 14:14)

And so she gave up.  She gave up rebuilding, and she gave up tearing down.  She gave up doubting and second guessing and fearing.  She gave up caring about her castle, and she gave up hating it.  She gave up wanting a new one and she gave up clinging to the old one.  She gave up trusting in the strength of an idealistic, castle-like dream, and she turned it over to the King.

"The Lord is my strength and my shield; in Him my heart trusts, and I am helped; 

my heart exults, and with my song I give thanks to Him."

(Psalm 28:7)

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Over and out,

~Emily